Prompt: The Healing Time by Pesha Joyce Gertler
In her song, Love Rain, Jill Scott sang, “You broke me, but I’m healing.” The first time that I heard this song I fell in love with it. “Love rain down on me,” Jilly from Philly would wail and my soul shivered a bit. Yet, I was vigilant in carrying my umbrella because I didn’t want to get too wet. Running away from love’s damp discomfort so I could be dry and comfortable. I find myself eager to retire my umbrella, but I don’t want to get caught out in a destructive storm too far from shelter.
One afternoon while driving around town listening to Love Rain, I reflected on many of the songs that stir my soul when I hear them are mournful songs of love gone wrong or love unrequited. I proudly admit that I love a good torch song!
I cannot recall the exact moment when I began to heal, but I am grateful to be in a new era in my life. I’m largely content and striving to manifest my dreams. There has been a lot of subtraction from my life to clear space for new things to be added. I created vacuums by ejecting Whytni and Anna from my passenger seat, letting go of voracious concern for Alex, Anana, and Sherri until they are able to choose an affirmative path at their respective crossroads, and, most importantly, I’m clearing out my vault of traumatic memories. In addition to seeing bits of flooring, I can also see walls. Some walls are gray and dreary while others are murals in technicolor with arousing hues of cobalt blue, fuchsia, lapiz lazuli, emerald green, and plum. These murals are living entities wherein the underlying gray is slowing being consumed by vibrant color.
I wonder what to make of the gray walls? Perhaps they are murals yet to become. Perhaps they are the chromatic opposites of black and white battling for supremacy. The white embodying the spectrum of colors that represent possibilities and the black representing a rejection of possibilities or a death grip on past wounds or a refusal to walk into my light. I resent the negative characterization of Black, yet I embrace the strength and struggle that it signifies in a world and society that has sought to exploit and discard it. Us. Me. We struggle, strive, and survive against titanic odds each day. We pray and contemplate each