Heading In

This is not my first time gulping down the barium. I don’t recall it being particularly problematic last time, but I have my moments when I’m very “go with the flow.”I would like a firm diagnosis and a course of action. Some clue as to what exactly is going on in my...

Cost of Investment

My anxiety was evident enough. It was not that body out of sorts, but not really aware of it. No, it was upset stomach and farting all day kind of anxiety. I silently apologized to all of the folks sitting in proximity to me during our six-hour flight to Long...

Do You See Me? Do You Really Want To?

Inspired by Eavonka’s NEA award acceptance speech As a pre-adolescent, I used to wish for a major illness or injury. Something that would demand the attention of others. I blindly went about coping with these tragedies in my mind without realizing that the...

Ch-Ch-Changes

Perspective. Failure versus feedback on a less than optimal course of action. Wrong versus still figuring it out. Falling apart versus opportunity to realign and rebuild. Losing versus concrete appraisal of performance. Loss versus letting go of that which traps us....

Trans-Liminal

Life is liminal—we don’t know, think that we know, realize that we know, then grow wise. Life is inevitable, yet undetermined. Life is fabulous and fucked. These states of being alternate and intertwine like ill-fated lovers. Life is exciting and mundane. Anticipating...

On the Road

Truth be told, I’d have to get my mind right. At this point in my life, I tend to get a bit unpleasant in anticipation of any road trip that exceeds 90 minutes. If there’s traffic, then I get to practice my road rage management techniques that my therapist...